Human beings are hardwired for connection. Even introverts, with our fun-loving adoration of “alone time,” need meaningful relationships with others. To form relationships, we need to figure out not only how to contribute a verse, but also what that verse is and why it’s so important to share. We seek validation, belonging, and a voice.
Even with all of our technology and our ability to communicate much more easily than ever before, some of us still hesitate. We hide. We’re not confident our voice or message matters. Trust me, friends, it does. Here are three powerful reasons why sharing your verse and voice are so important.
Why We Hide
Four main fears that keep us from sharing our verse with others, and they are:
- Spectacular Success
- Being seen as our authentic selves
One of the most common reasons we stop ourselves from doing anything outside our comfort zone is the fear of failure. What if we launch the business and can’t attract customers? What if we write the book and no one buys it? What if…what if…what if… Lather. Rinse. Repeat. It’s important to remember that when we share our verse, we cannot fail, we can only learn. Yes, we may not get the outcome we really want, (the successful business, the strong-selling book) but if we are being our authentic selves (more on that in a bit) and are offering our verse in ways that are true to ourselves, at some point our people will find us.
If you are offering something from a place of authenticity, you cannot fail, only learn.
A popular acronym that goes with fail is First Attempt In Learning. When we don’t get what we want with our message, our product, our service, or our verse, we can either give up, or we can use what we learned and “fail forward” or “first attempt in learning forward.” Not sharing your verse because of a fear of failure dooms you to not trying anything new. It keeps you stuck on auto-pilot and prevents you from growing in multiple areas of your life.
Fear of rejection is another fear that keeps us from sharing our verse. What if no one likes us? What if we get made fun of? What if our family / spouse / significant other / coworkers think we’re crazy? The longer we live, the more we learn about what we’re called to contribute to the world. We’re also challenged to decide how much we’ll let others’ opinions and judgments impact us. Rejection is inevitable because no one goes through life getting everything they want; it’s in how we handle the rejection that we find the ability to learn, grow, and, once again, find those that want to be part of our tribe.
By staying in your place of authenticity, you remember that though rejection may feel personal,
only you determine your worth and the worth of your verse.
Learning not to take rejection personally takes practice because deep down, it hurts. We want people to be supportive and excited for us. We want to feel validated that we’ve done the right thing because what we’ve done may be incredibly vulnerable. When you don’t get the reaction or validation you’re looking for, don’t beat yourself up. Listen to the opinions of others, take the grains of truth from their comments objectively, and remember that your verse and voice still have value, you just may be talking to the wrong people.
A subtle and sometimes hidden reason people are afraid to share their message is fear of spectacular success. When we see people absolutely crushing it in their business niche, we may admire them and even be a little envious. Subconsciously though, we may have fear around what would happen if we found that same level of success. Would we have to work 120 hours a week? Would we need to travel 30 weeks a year? How many people would we need to hire to make those six or seven figures? We become buried under an avalanche of worry because we feel we lack the skills and resources to handle massive success and so we unconsciously push it away and self-sabotage.
You and only you are the one who defines spectacular success and you do it by
tapping in to your most authentic self.
The secret to working with fear of success is to visualize what success means to you and then having the courage to make that vision come true. If you don’t want to work 120 hours a week, don’t. If traveling 30 weeks a year sounds exciting – do it! If it doesn’t, figure out ways not to do that. If you’ve never managed a team and need a Director of Operations, research the best practices on how to hire one.
You always have the power to be spectacularly successful
because you are always in charge of your actions.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Don’t be afraid to stumble along the way. Do be afraid to play small and stay silent because it’s a surefire way to avoid spectacular success.
Fear of being seen for who we truly are can be a powerful reason not to share our verse. This fear encompasses all of those other fears I mentioned above. I may fail. Someone may not like what I’m doing, and I’ll be rejected. What happens if I blow success out of the galaxy and don’t know how to manage it?
Our authentic self is trying to raise us to a higher plane of physical, mental, emotional,
financial and spiritual fulfillment; listen to that self and let your light shine.
Now more than ever, we need voices and verses that help both ourselves and others. We need light shining into dark places where more empathy, compassion, and caring could do monumental good. By being your authentic self and facing your fears, you start, one step at a time, to contribute your verse. How would you like to be rewarded?
What We Lose Without You
A trap we can easily get caught in amidst the noise of our modern world is that what we have to share is “already out there,” “it’s been “done before,” or “it’s not “original.” Please don’t let these limiting thoughts stop you. While your offering may indeed “already be out there,” the way you off it will be unique. Rest assured, your way hasn’t been done before. If you don’t share what you do in your own way, how many people will lose out?
As a reminder, one kind word, one successful conversation, or one aha moment, can impact one person, or it can impact a million people. Here’s the secret: there is no difference in value between impacting one person or a million people. You’ve still made an impact. What if your message impacts one person and that person goes on to impact a million people? Your point of view on impact directly affects your actions and can show you what others are missing out on if you don’t show up and share your verse.
Finally, everyone misses out if you don’t show up as your most authentic self. We can share our joy, our message, and our calling with others more than ever before. So why not do that? By being able to see ourselves as both unique and as part of the greater human family, we’re able to help not only ourselves, but others, one or a million people at a time.
Make the Offer
To start sharing your verse and shining your light, remember these three things:
- It will take practice
- It may test your self-worth, and your self-worth can only be determined by you
- All the people may not be your people – and that’s a good thing
Think about what you’d like to share and then think about how you can turn that sharing into an offering with detachment. Shifting to an offering with detachment asks you to simply spread the word and leave expectations at the door. Not everyone will resonate with your message. That’s OK. Not everyone will buy your product. That’s OK. But someone, even if it’s only one someone, will understand, agree with, and “get” your verse. And, even if you don’t know who that someone is, you may literally change or save their life. Detachment means putting your offering out into the world, trusting that who needs to hear it will hear it, and believing that your message will have an impact.
To help you start sharing your verse today, ask yourself these questions:
- What would I like to share? Don’t be fooled into thinking it’s been easy for everyone else to start sharing their messages. You don’t know what hesitations or doubts they had. Simply think about what you’d like to share in your own unique way.
- Where can you start sharing that feels safe? Go with your gut instinct. If this means telling a close friend, go with that. If it means sharing something on social media because you feel most safe there, do that too.
- What ONE thing can you do TODAY to start sharing your verse? Do you need to have a conversation? Create a post? Decide what you want to share first? Whatever it is, take action TODAY to share one thing.